Man was 08 a hell of a year....I'm not much of a "In with a new out with the old!" Phony kinda shit for a new year cuz you need to better yourself day by day not just because its a new year. But It was definately a year for me when shit got REAL lol. Two school years without basketball, working and going to school, plenty of adversity and crazy shit happening. In a sense at times during 2008 I felt at my lowest in my life. Probably as low as when I lived with my Dad when I was little and it was definately the worst time of my life. I wouldn't ever think I would say anything like that but it was tough at times and it was great at times. I really appreciate the people that came in my life in 08. Alot of them were there for me through thick and thin when shit got REAL bad for me. I changed schools in 08, basketball was taken away from me, had a scare with Mom's, watched my brothers get older and make me feel old because they are doing REALY WELL! 08 Definately gave me a crazy perspective again, I think this was another year without a girlfriend lol. On the same bullshit as usual with that lol. I have always appreciated my Mom's but she has really been there for me this year when shit got bad. I saw my support system get stronger for me and stick by my side through 08. Moms, Brandon, Alicia, Jeremy, Jasmine, Nina, Archie, Jordan. Sabrina and I talked through problems we had and in a sense were someone we could lean on cuz we both were going through shit. I got to see my older step sister Toi who I hadn't seen in 10 plus years. I'm definately happy about that, I re-couped with my biological Pops. Shit aint eva changed with him and probably will never but hey we talk now lol.
So to end 08 Vegas it was....Sabrina, Crystina, Mike, Marketa (definately don't know if I spelled that right lol) and I made the short trip there for a day. Left at 6ish got there at 10ish got on teh strip drank a little, was around about a millie plus others on the packed ass strip. It was definately one to remember, funny as hell I'm not gonna elaborate on the stories though lol.
In 09 I just look forward to growth, thats all I can look forward to on the daily. Day in and day out you have to try to to get better. If your not I feel like your hurting yourself and depriving yourself from getting better at life and whatever it is you do. If your a hairdresser and your not tryna get better your f'n up your money. If your a hooper and you don't try to get better on the daily your f'n up your game. If your the President and your not trying to get better your f'n it up for the world. So thats that with that lol. But man I just look forward to basketball, being able to get back on the court in a organized fashion. I still have this fire buring deep inside and I HAVE to accomplish these goals because it's what I love to do....
I look forward to my family because I definately love them dearly, Mom's everybody already know's I love her to death, my stanky booty ass little brothers who I love and have to show more to them so they know I do, my step pops. We so laid back we do ever show it but we both know we do lol. My Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, on every side of my family. I have to show them love. I want to be able to be a backbone for all of my family and be the leader when its my turn. Hell it will prepare me for when I have my own immediate family.
I look forward to just striving to do better, to pushing myself harder than I ever have. To being a man, to being more of a man.
To more fun lol....you can't ever stop having fun and enjoying yourself or you will become miserable.
I look forward to my spiritual growth with God. I have to have it, being at Vanguard is a great experience because it's helping me grow this way and helps me learn more and put things in a different perspective.
I look forward to.....ummm....muthafuck ima say it....Gettin a girl?? lol
Yes yes I know never thought you would hear it from JB but hey nigga's gotta grow up right?? Lol
I look forward to gettin back in the gym this summer lol. I love that shit! It's the best time of the year to me! Liftin, shootin, running. Ciara gotta have me right this summer! lol Better than last when she worked Brandon and I out....
I look forward to more dope music coming out cuz I love it lol....
I look forward to finiancial prosperity....not to flaunt the shit but to being able to be comfortable and help others.
And to finish this off I'm gonna write it....I shouldn't well maybe I should....or maybe I shouldn't but who cares. Man this is the last thing thats on my chest, I fell asleep thinking about it, I was in Vegas thinkin about it, I was thinkin about it on the way home from Vegas, hell on the way to Vegas....Thinkin about my heart, and whether its right or wrong. Whether the time is right?? Or if my thinking is cloudy....If I should try to do it or if I should just leave it alone....It made me wonder why I am the way I am and why I have always done the things I have done in these situations. Why I have just shut things out,why " I'm like a vault baby locked down!" (thats from Hitch if you didn't know lol). Why??? Why ask why?? What is why?? Why is it like this??? Can I talk my shit again??? Lol.....
I'm outta here man....I just felt like writing this. I felt like doing this.....Notice I'm talking about how I feel or felt. Weird coming from me. But um two fingers up, and I'll tell ya like a rapper, Holla back!
JB
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